Relationships
Energy Healing in Motion
There are all kinds of relationships that we have such as business, friends, primary relationship, relatives and people that we encounter in everyday life.  Relationships provide a mirror for us to see ourselves.  Ever notice that when someone is able to push our buttons and create a reaction within us, it is the very same issue that we need to confront and look at. 

We focus a good deal of time on that primary relationship.  We want our soul mate to appear in our life so that we can then experience the “happily ever after”. How many times have we been disappointed in looking for that one person?  Are we looking for that person to “complete us”?
In Greg Bradden’s book, the Divine Matrix, he discusses that there are three universal fears that we encounter.  These are abandonment, self loathing and low self worth, and the third is trust.  In our childhood we are complete sponges to learning and growing.  We do not always understand the complexities of human relationships.  Oftentimes abandonment was misunderstood or maybe it was truly experienced.  The thought of being “alone” or “abandoned” can be triggered when we are in a relational situation that is unhealthy or may come into our thinking to sabotage a potentially healthy relationship.

Perhaps opportunities appear before us and we freeze at the thought of seizing them because we are not worthy of such.  Low self worth is often passed down through generations and the collective consciousness of mankind.  It may be programmed into us that others are worthy of an amazing relationship but it is not for me.

Trust that has been broken or was in the appearance of being broken brings great sadness and hurt.  There is great hesitancy to trust again with the thought I may get hurt!  How can we be open and expect that relationship to be spectacular without trust.  It may work for a time but soon our issues of jealousy, trust and resentments creep in and disaster is being painted all over the relationship.

So often in a relationship we see flaws and defects in another and somehow feel compelled to change them. If we could only change them, they would fit so nicely into our manuscript of life. As we engage in this senseless adventure we become blinded to their unacceptable behavior.  We become angry because they are not changing. We can live with this unacceptable behavior and “just take it,” or we can fight it and try to gain dominance.  Neither way will lead to peace. Just taking it continues to add to the already filled negative subconscious fear messages of, “I am not worthy of better treatment”. Fighting back will only create a negative backlash. Even if we win do we think the other person will be free of resentments and hostility?

The key to relationships is acceptance.  We can accept everyone just as they are, not try to change them, and see them as they are with no judgment or criticism. If we find unacceptable behavior we first can see it as a distant observer.  No judgments, no condemnations just see it as it is.  Then we are in a position to make choices.  We can choose to set boundaries that distance ourselves from the unacceptable behavior, or we can remove ourselves from this person and walk away without judgment or condemnation. 

Setting up boundaries may initially create animosity for the other party.  No one likes when boundaries are established on them. However, it does provide us momentary serenity allowing us to recharge and empower our spirit.  Setting up boundaries is relatively easy for work partners, friends and distant relatives. Setting boundaries with loved ones is a much more difficult challenge.  If setting up boundaries creates anxiety and guilt in us we can always look at our intention.  If we are not at a place of peace perhaps our intention of establishing the boundary was not honorable.  Was it done out of love and kindness or was it done out of anger and rage? 

Let’s look at relationships from another perspective.  Instead of searching for the mate of our dreams or trying to change others we can look at ourselves.  The focus and attention is made on what areas can I improve. What are my strengths and weaknesses?  Ask yourself the question, “What good would it be I found a great match but I was not ready?”   How long do you think that this relationship would last? These and other questions we need to explore.  The focus is to determine how “relationship ready” we are and what relationship factors do we need to work on. Are there negative programs and fear blocking us from experiencing a healthy relationship?  When we are the best that we can and have the attitude of being worthy to have the best person for the universe will supply us with who we need.

There are several tools that are made available to you that can help you explore yourself and identify areas that will help you become more relationship ready.  Here is one tool that may help you. If you are currently in a relationship and want to determine how much compatibility there is between you. This is not limited to primary relationships but to any kind of relationship.  Try this exercise so that you determine how closely they match to your values.  Take a sheet of paper and write down all the attributes that are important to you in your relationship.  Then after each attribute, note if your partner currently has any of these qualities.  Do not check them off if you feel they have the potential to get there.  Mark them as they currently are.  Add up the number of attributes your partner has and divide them by the total number of attributes.  Is your partner’s grade acceptable?  If not, a lot of work is needed to maintain this relationship on a long term basis.
Tarot Cards - Six of Cups
Destiny Cards - Queen of Hearts
Element - Fire
Summer Season
Another tool available to you is to determine your compatibility with specific areas where you are strongest or areas where there may be problems there is the relationship compatibility tool.  It requires you to both take the questionnaire.  This questionnaire focuses on four primary aspects of a relationship:

  • Physical
  • Emotional
  • Intellectual
  • Spiritual
Relationship Tools for you